Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Fun on election day

"Whaat?!?" you say. "Yes," I say. "Let's have a little fun."

The following is from an e-mail I received months ago from a bridge friend of mine. I've been saving it for just such an occasion.


Do you like Robin Williams? (Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don't.) However, this one is definitely on my "I do" list.

Picture him wearing a t-shirt that says (in Arabic) "I love New York." (pause for you to get a mental picture) Ready? (Sure?) He's holding a microphone and addressing a crowd ... ...


"I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here's one plan:

1 - The US will apologize to the world for our 'interference' in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those 'good ole boys'. We will never 'interfere' again.

2 - We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea, the Middle East, and the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.

3 - All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of who or where they are. They're illegal!!! France will welcome them.

4 - All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself and don't hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.

5 - No foreign 'students' over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a 'D' and it's back home baby.

6 - The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient, energy wise. This will include developing non-polluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.

7- Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)

8 - If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not 'interfere'. They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides, most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.

9 - Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

10 - All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us 'Ugly Americans' any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH ... learn it ... or LEAVE ... Now, isn't that a winner of a plan?

The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses'. She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'You want a piece of me?'"


I haven't voted yet. Have you?? However, I must say that I have been inspired to get my 'you know what' off of this chair and get out there!

3 comments:

Craig Peihopa said...

Love it! Thanks for sharing this. I have met Robin Williams and found him to be every bit the person we see on celluloid. I would love to see this as a skit or something.

Tammy said...

LOL!

Most of the time I love Robin Williams.

And yes, I've voted. Felt like a lamb going to the slaughter, me being blue in a very red city. The ladies working in my precinct are sweet ladies in my ward who have seen my Obama sign in my yard and I know are very disapproving of it. lol. I love rocking the boat. ;)

Craig Peihopa said...

His language is a little more colourful than I might choose, but he is a talent!

Tammy good for you with rocking the boat. I personally do not hold much sway in which party or which person wins the elections I have voted in, because largely they will always blame the government before for the lack of ability to complete all of their pork barrel promises but I love that you are different.

You go girl!!!