A blogger friend of mine is closing down her site.
Here is what you read on the opening page ...
This is my story as I journey to places unknown in life ... be it as a wife, a mother, a Christian woman, a friend, or a cancer fighter/survivor. Please know that what I write comes from my heart and soul. My hope is that you see and hear the real me in my writings, quirks and all. Thank you for taking the time to join me on my journey. May we all find beauty, peace, love, and happiness on our way to places unknown.
Isn't that beautiful?
Judy was first diagnosed with breast cancer six years ago. Her current rounds with chemotherapy (fighting the first recurrence of this awful disease) were making her quite ill. She went in every Friday, and did not feel like much of anything until the following Tuesday.
Her posts were all over the place. Most days she was really 'down' and talked about how she was losing her faith in God, that she had no friends, and no one to turn to. Some days, tho, she was feeling almost human. She got her hair cut. That made her feel better.
I noticed that hardly anyone was commenting on her posts. I didn't know her at all -- I'd just found her site cruising the net -- but I hated the thought of someone going through all this thinking that no one cared about her. I began leaving comments. I didn't know what to say, really. I tried to find something positive in each post and expand a bit on that. It wasn't often easy, but I did the best I could. I'm not very good with stuff like that.
She only had two more chemo visits scheduled. Even tho it was making her sick, she thought she was seeing a little light at the end of the tunnel.
Then, last week she found a lump. She went to the doctor immediately, of course, and they did lab tests along with a biopsy, which turned out to be quite painful. She was to find out the results this past Friday.
Well, Thursday night she couldn't sleep and wrote a post describing her fears. I checked her site every day for news. Nothing until today. It's bad news. She's scheduled for major surgery next week followed by more chemotherapy. She did not say what the prognosis is.
Now she's worried about how far throughout her body the cancer might have already spread. She's questioning God. She's going to stop posting, she says, because she has nothing good to say and she wants to conserve what energy she has for her husband and their 3-year-old daughter.
I'm going to share with you my comments on her last post. They're terribly inadequate, I know. I thought and thought, but just couldn't come up with anything that might be of comfort. If you read my words, perhaps you can send a prayer Judy's way that will be better than what I could come up with.
I am so sorry, Judy. I will think of you often in the coming weeks and months. I don't have any magic words to say. If you feel like it, you're more than welcome to read my posts. You know where to find me. I'm sending you a gigantic hug ... hope you can feel it.
I didn't include any platitudes about how God loves her or how I would be praying for her, as I have done before. She's so down right now. I didn't have the right words. Maybe you can find some?