I entered the bridge studio yesterday morning to play with Julian and tried to make a beeline for the coffee and water. As usual, I was running smack dab on the button, but it would quickly be game time, and I had to try and find Julian as soon as possible so we could get started on filling out a current convention card. There were a few things that had to be discussed.
I say "tried to make a beeline" because I was instantly waylaid by Margie, one of the members of our Swiss team for the Regional coming up in February (see yesterday's post), who gushed, with a big smile on her face, "Oh, I'm so happy (or some such) that you'll be playing with us in February."
She was a real threat to distract me from my current focus, which was to grab my coffee and water and get on over to where Julian was waiting, and I responded with something so outrageous, so ridiculous, so unbelievable (I thought!) that she would immediately know I was not serious and was making a joke. We would visit later, I thought to myself as I continued on my way.
What did I say? Well, I don't remember exactly, but the gist of it was that how could she possibly think I'd be playing with them on their team in February? Am pretty sure I told her I said "No way!" to Evelyn, and you know what? She believed me (!), altho I didn't find that out until much later in the session when Julian and I played against Edna (who will be my partner on the team) and Margie for three boards.
I had just returned to the table from refreshing my coffee and was dismayed to notice Edna carefully wiping some sort of foodstuff off of Julian's bright yellow shirt with a napkin. (My napkin, btw.) Oh, no! He and I had only moments before been congratulating each other on not spilling any food on ourselves or our clothing. (I was wearing white pants. Just as bad. Normally, it takes me all of about 10 seconds after I first put a pair of white pants on to spill something on them or brush up against something dirty, doncha know?)
What food? Well, it was the official Unit 174 Christmas party at the Houston Bridge Studio and there were three long tables chock full of absolutely delicious goodies. Julian had visited the tables twice already - he got there well before I did, and at one point I saw him happily consuming a very large piece of coconut cream pie.
After his shirt was pronounced presentable again, we all exchanged pleasantries and were taking our hands out of the first board when I turned to Edna and said, "We'll have to schedule a date." I meant a practice session prior to February where she and I could fill out a mutually agreed upon convention card.
And this is when I discovered that Margie had been completely fooled by my smartass comeback earlier. Oh, my! Edna said, "You're not available in February, right?" "What are you talking about?" I answered. "We're going to be partners in the Swiss."
Towards the end of my response, of course, I remembered what I'd said to Margie an hour or so prior and my voice kind of trailed off. I turned to Margie and asked, in a semi state of shock, "You didn't believe what I said, did you?"
Oh, my! Shades of Gloria Visser - an Upper Peninsula neighbor of ours from many years back, for whom my first husband would lie awake some nights trying to figure out ever more convoluted, but still semi-believable lies - embellishments of the truth, he liked to think of them - to tell her. He wanted to see how far he could actually go before she would stop with the huge wide-eyed "Oh, really?!?" It took a while, but eventually - with her husband's and my help - she caught on. In the meantime, my husband enjoyed every moment.
But getting back to Margie and Edna, I believe that everything is now all straightened out. At least, I hope so! Will have to give them a call later today to make sure. I should probably call Evelyn, too. She played in the game yesterday. I don't recall who her partner was, and I didn't happen to see any of them after the game.
You know, ever since Arlene Weingarten published "A Talented Funny Lady" on November 15th, many people in the duplicate bridge world have come up to me and said how much they're enjoying my blog. Not one, however - with the exception of Arlene, has left a comment, which is about par for the course. I don't leave comments on all the blogs I read, either!
And just because many in the duplicate bridge world are following my blog and enjoying the posts doesn't mean that everyone in the bridge world is! Certainly not Evelyn, Margie, or Edna, right? Otherwise, they would have known better than to believe what I said to Margie upon first entering the studio.
So, Goldenrod, and anyone else reading this who might occasionally be guilty of being flippant and accidentally believed, be careful what you say.